the unbearable closeness of
trans friendships
Photo by Zackary Drucker, the Gender Spectrum Collection.
I close my eyes and imagine a long table at a fictional family reunion. Cousins, aunts, uncles, parents, grandparents, family friends and more are huddled around the table laughing, arguing and shoveling food into their mouths.
Then I blink.
All the energy, intensity, and connection remains but there are only two people: me and my trans BFF. That’s how trans friendships feel. You feel deeply indebted to the other person because they make you feel seen and held in a way you don’t by others. It’s as if your survival depends on each other. But eventually the cracks begin to show: You didn’t show up for me, you’re suffocating me, you’re avoiding me, etc. These are also the themes that drive so much of musical theater: Where do I end and you begin? What do we owe each other? Can two people continue loving each other and grow in different directions?
I started writing the songs that would become Totally Normal because I wanted to give voice to the trans stories that aren’t usually fodder for theater. Shows about trans people are mostly produced by cis people, for cis audiences that want to gawk at us without acknowledging the fullness of our experiences or demonstrating any interest in our well-being. Trans people get portrayed as living crisis to crisis, causing gay panic, solving some cis person’s problems or all of the above. As far as I know, there’s never been a low-stakes stage comedy about trans people just…being people. In this historical moment when authentic trans stories are finally starting to be recognized by the mainstream, I’m so excited to be creating a show that never defers to the cis gaze.
B Noel Thomas as Sherry in The Red Shades at Z Space, October 2022. Photo by Jay Yamada.
My collaborators and I aren’t interested in playing queer respectability politics. Squid and Tabitha, our protagonists, don’t inspire empathy by behaving like perfect trans role models. They’re both beautiful, sometimes infuriating disasters. In other words, they’re three-dimensional people. No one in our show is a punching bag. The laughs come from the absurdities of contemporary trans experience and a healthy dose of vaudevillian slapstick. With this silly screwball musical, we’re affirming that trans lives are vibrant, funny, melodious and Totally Normal.
Beyond wanting to tell a great story about trans folks and their queer community, Matt, Kelly and I are consciously developing a production that gives opportunities to trans people at every level. Yes, some of the more visible barriers for trans people in musical theater are starting to break down—shoutout to Little Shop of Horrors’ Jinkx Monsoon and Some Like It Hot’s J. Harrison Ghee—but lasting progress for trans representation in the medium requires creating employment for performers, writers, producers, choreographers, costume designers, stage managers and everyone else who makes shows happen. By giving trans creatives more chances to step up and reach their potential, we are contributing to career development outcomes for trans folks that will result in more trans leadership in theater and better stories for everyone.
I know we can do it, because we’ve done it before. Just ask anyone who attended a performance of The Red Shades, my last collaboration with Matt. Produced by Z Space in San Francisco, sold-out crowds cheered and chanted along with the performers onstage as they reenacted the story of the 1966 Compton’s Cafeteria Riot. We received incredible, inspiring feedback from audience members.
“Watching your show was like medicine to me.”
“My faith in the community was shook. You all have renewed me.”
This is why we do the work we do. There are very few musicals made with trans communities in mind, so we’re keeping our future trans and queer attendees front and center as we develop Totally Normal. There’s no party quite like a bunch of rowdy queers at an event produced by us, for us, and we can’t wait for you to experience this one.
See you at the show. Bring your trans bestie!
~Reina, April 2024